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Aping a provincial nightclub, women are granted full use of the site free of charge, while men have to pay. I can’t help but wonder why he didn’t just sign up for the Affair Guarantee Package of 2,000 credits at a reasonable £229.80.

But they are outnumbered by a second group of twentysomethings who are just as straightforward.

“A sugar daddy,” comes one succinct response to my introductory question. The site invites me to spend it at every turn, and users were even charged £15 to delete their profile prior to the hack.

He says he stayed with his partner only because she announced she was pregnant.

“Being the nice guy I am, I offered to stick around,” he tells me.

And now the Tinder experience is about to jump from our phones to our physical lives, thanks to the genius of AI technology.

Greg Blatt, the CEO of Tinder’s parent company and one of the best online dating sites, Match, has announced exciting new features that he promises to ‘blur the lines between the physical and digital worlds for dating.’ After the success of Tinder Gold – which lets you pay to see who swiped right on you – the new features expected to hit Tinder in early 2018 include AI and geolocation functions allowing users to fully immerse themselves into the activities of the people they’ve already been matched with.

These latest Tinder updates come after a long line of game-changing extra functions in the last few years, including the development of Tinder online so that you can literally swipe anywhere.

Here’s everything else you need to know about Tinder and how to maximise it.

One is old enough to be my mother and has a username that, without giving too much away, is an instruction to engage part of my mouth with a baked good she has in her possession.

Another user says she’s looking for: “A passionate one-night stand like there is no tomorrow”.

Tinder is still on top as the most popular of all the best sex apps, and 2017 has seen the numbers of Tinder’s paid users rocketing to 476,000 singletons subscribing for premium access.