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While on the lookout for anything that could be used against me, all the while constantly being told I was a bad person, a bad father, and all my involvement with my son was systematically stripped away. Others resort to violence and anger against the ex-wife.

I still believe this, but I also believe in empathy, and for recognizing each other’s humanity.

Personally, I refuse to be blackmailed by my better instincts.

I refuse to be reduced to the level of a Disneyland dad by some judge, attorney, social worker or indeed his mother. One day, I will be able to get in touch without going through her once the child is old enough.

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After studying this issue for the four years I’ve had this blog, I understand that the issue is complicated and nuanced, and there is plenty of legitimate room for both points of view, outlined above.

But as introverts, we sometimes feel misunderstood.

We wish you could visualize what’s going on inside our brains—you might be surprised!

You can read more about my stance in favor of shared parenting, empathy for absentee fathers, and other related topics here: “My kid’s dad isn’t involved and I don’t know what to say” The real reason your ex doesn’t see the kids How to get dads involved in divorced and separated families Close the pay gap? 50-50 visitation and no child support Should you date a guy who doesn’t see his kids?